"Sterilization" is not usually a menu item I expect to hear when I call a business. Then again I'm also not accustomed to being offered free lube (don't need it but neat!), not having to pay for birth control, and talking to a receptionist behind bullet-proof glass.
Yes, it's that time of year to renew the old b.c.s and this year I don't have student health insurance. Where to go? Planned Parenthood, of course.
I admit I was a little nervous about the whole thing. I wasn't quite ready to go to a new clinic after having such good experiences with my gynecologists at ASU where they all seem to have bemused non-phased expressions about anything they see.
So I got ready for my appointment this morning and was calmed by the waterfall structure outside the building with the sign "It's more important to be effective than important." This calm was quickly extinguished once I saw that the receptionist was behind bullet-proof glass. Really? Is female reproductive health really so threatening to people that they have to murder receptionists? Wouldn't you find it weird if you went to the doctor for like, an earache and the person checking you in was in a bullet-proof vest or something? Turns out I was in the administration building by accident and she directed me to the building around the corner for the actual clinic.
The clinic, by the way, was behind two unmarked black doors tucked away in a building with Enterprise-Rent-A-Car and a gym, and accessibly only through an elevator lined with metal. Seriously?
I'm someone who is confident in my sexuality so can only image how terrifying it is for shy women to go to that PP.
Anyway I walk through the two black unmarked doors and lightly smile in line to hid my nervousness. This receptionist didn't have bullet-proof glass but she did have an attitude. The lobby was tiny so we could all hear what everyone's health problem was. Lady #1 needed to pick up her prescription, Lady #2 needed the morning after pill, I needed my yearly re-fill of birth control, Lady #3 wanted to get her pills there because she just started a new job and can't apply for their health care yet. Heath care health care health care. None of us had it. And most of the women in the lobby were about 30ish.
As I filled out my paper work I was annoyed at the receptionist and the irony that she was chastising the morning after pill lady for not being responsible in setting up an appointment instead of being a walk-in. Lady, if she was responsible she wouldn't be getting the morning after pill [laughs].
I was told to go in the back to pee in a cup for STD testing and get my finger pricked for my HIV test. FUCKING HELL it hurt to get my finger pricked. When I got my last HIV test years ago all they had to do was swipe my inner check with a swab. WTF?
Another weird thing about Planned Parenthood, they had clinicians working there, not gynecologists. I mean, they were able to help me but I guess I was just surprised.
Next up was the nurse who didn't make eye contact with me as she asked me the standard questions of when was my last period, how many partners have I had during the past year, do I do vaginal, oral, anal or all three, is anyone making me do something I don't want to do, have I have contracted an STD, when was my last pap smear, ect. It was concerning how cold and profession she was. I answered the questions--all the same healthy answers for the past 5 years.
The clinician came in who looked about 30 years old and male. I've had a male gyno visit before so I thought I was comfortable with it [actually, my first pap smear was done by a male resident, with a male gyno supervising, and the required female nurse in the room. I made them all laugh by saying, "I've never had this big of audience in my life!"]. So I don't mind guy doctors, but this guy's age was throwing me off. He asked his round of questions and I told him the same story. I've been on Kelnor for the past 3 years and I love it. No problems. No issues. Same partner the past 5 years. Only using the pill. Got my last exam last May before graduation when I had student health care.
I highly recommend Kelnor by the way. I always start on a Tuesday morning, end by Friday night, with only slight cramping for a few hours, and day 1 is always super light.
He wrote me a new year's worth of a prescription and told me that my brand isn't covered by PP but I could have free condoms and lube if I needed. Really? Free lube? I mean, that's pretty neat that lube is covered but it seems kinda unnecessary and shouldn't that money be better spent on things like breast cancer treatment or something?
But as I neared the counter they handed me a green card and told me that my income is low enough that I qualify for state funding. My whole visit was free.
I was further shocked when I went to Target to give them my new prescription for refills and I got my birth control for free. WHAT? I COULD HAVE BEEN GETTING FREE BIRTH CONTROL THIS WHOLE TIME?!?! Sweet! Of course, I know it's not technically free. PP is funding in part by your tax dollars and mine. So thanks! Lol.
I admit I felt a little guilty taking the pills for free. I mean, I am an able bodied person. And shouldn't guys get some sort of medication equally free? Or should I listen to my friend Jesús who think women should have free birth control because it helps the men who are their partners in not having children too. I pay for plenty of things with my taxes as a citizen, like the roads, the sidewalks, the public school system, the prison system, the street lights, ect so I guess it's nice to get something for "free" which benefits my health.
In conclusion, I am mixed about my experience at Planned Parenthood. I got my visit for free, I was tested for free (negative for anything), and my birth control for free, so I'm grateful to save about $350 a year. But they weren't especially nice and I wouldn't want to go for them if I had a health issue.
And it makes me miss my student health care when visiting the gyno was in the same building as the other kinds of doctor. And I miss my favorite gynecologist who cared about safe sex and well-being sex. She was always cheerful and open and with a wave of her hand was the 1st doctor to tell me we didn't need to use condoms anymore since we were tested and I was on the pill. She also helped me with an article I was writing for class about vajazzling and told me that 90% of all of her patients shave some or all of their pubic hair and this number has increased the past 20 years. She was also confident that I can be pregnant one day despite my tiny size and wanted to warn my friends and I that using thongs too frequently can cause yeast infections. She's the reason I know that the longer you stay on a certain type of birth control pill the more effective it becomes, and she would never let me leave her office without reminding me to use the bathroom or squat after sex to flush out fluid to prevent infections, and to consider taking a multivitamin as I got older. I guess that's the trade-off when you pay for health care vs free health care and I'm not sure which is better.
Oh well! For now I'm safe, healthy, didn't have to spend any money today, and I have two new packs in the drawer ready to go. All in all, a successful day. :)
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